Wednesday, November 16, 2016

The Heart of a True Princess

At the center of every girl’s existence lies the heart of a true princess. We all grow up wishing that we were Cinderella or Jasmine or one of the many other Disney princesses we girls watched growing up. My daughter’s favorite, I think, was Ariel from the Disney movie The Little Mermaid. We all dream of the handsome prince finding us and rescuing us from the black knight or the wicked dragon who has stolen us away from our family and home to hide us in a dark cave or deep dungeon.

I have always had a desire to be Cinderella. To be heard by the “fairy godmother,” dressed in the most beautiful gown at the ball, and to be the most beautiful girl in the eyes of my “Prince Charming.” He would sweep me off my feet and carry me away in our coach to live happily ever after in a castle in the sky. I know I’m a romantic; but a hopeful one, not hopeless!

Even little boys long to be the hero, to rescue the Princess from the fierce dragon, the black knight, or maybe save her from the “Dread Pirate, Roberts.” Or they may want to be cowboys, taking cows to market and rescuing travelers on the trail to new destinations. Or maybe the mountain man, saving the village from the attack of wild animals. Men and boys all have the desire to be a savior and protector, of sorts, to the princess of their choosing.

And yet there those who always want to play the evil villain, dark knight, pirate, etc. who steals away the beautiful princess.

OK, so where is all this romanticizing going?

Let me explain. I feel the reason we girls have the desire – born within us – to be rescued by Prince Charming is more because of our desire to be reunited to the King of Kings, than our being caught up in the fairy tales that we grew up with. I know that most of us have heard the message we were each born with a God-shaped hole in our hearts that only HE can fill, and yet we are always trying to fill it with everything and everybody else.

It isn’t until we find Jesus that we can find this truth for ourselves. But instead of searching for Him, we run after the latest fad, be it the hippest rock star, movie idol or whatever your “flavor of the month” may be. Yet none of these things are truly meeting the needs of our hearts, we aren’t being fulfilled. So we turn to romance novels or the “Soaps” to live in a more “adult” fantasy than that of the fairytale princesses of our youth.

But God created us to be true princesses, to live in His kingdom forever. He put that heart of a princess into each and every one of us even before we were born. He also put the heart of a protector into each little boy. God built them to be the protectors of their families. To provide for the needs of their households; to give their very lives for them, just as Jesus gave up His life for His Bride – the church.

Jesus gave each of us the knowledge of Him and His kingdom in this simplistic way because He wanted each of us – men and women, boys and girls – to meet His Son, Jesus. To become a part of the “Bride of Christ.”

You see Jesus is THE Prince of Peace, King of Kings and Lord of Lords. And we, as children of Adam are separated from Him because of original sin and because of our own sins, as well. The longing we hold deep within us to become a princess should lead us straight into His arms. Should bring us to a place of repentance, seeking to be forgiven for all the sins of our past, so that we can live with Him forever in His Heavenly Kingdom. That kingdom began 2000+ years ago when He walked the earth among men and bought Salvation by giving His life for each and every one of us by shedding His blood on the cross.

I like the way John 3: 16-21 in the KJV says it; ‘For God so loved the world, that He sent His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth on Him should not perish, but have everlasting life. For God sent NOT His Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through Him might be saved. He that believeth on Him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the only begotten Son of God. And this is the condemnation, that light is come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil. For everyone that doeth evil hateth the light, neither cometh to the light, lest his deeds should be reproved. But he that doeth truth cometh to the light, that his deeds may be made manifest, that they are wrought in God.’

What a beautiful love story this truly is! The Prince came from the Eternal Kingdom to reconcile the outcast to the King and Kingdom life by giving up His life for them. He then came back to life and betrothed Himself to those He died to save. How utterly romantic.

The Appearance of a True Princess

While we are on the subject of Princesses and our Prince, we should take a look at how the Daughter of The King should behave.

While I was speaking to God one morning in my quiet time, He reminded me of what my physical and spiritual appearance should always be … a reflection of who I am in Jesus. He also said that I have been seeing myself as a defeated daughter and not a True Princess. He showed me that I saw myself without my royal crown, in a tattered dress and robe, hair falling out of its do and covered in a cloud of dust and dirt … How very UN-princess like.

Then He showed me a glimpse of what I should look like when I am in right standing, upholding my proper position, in Him and His Kingdom. So what SHOULD a True Princess look like?

We have all seen the fairytales that have beautiful princesses dressed in royal attire etc. We have also watched the British Royals in their various celebrations all dressed “to the nines.” As a daughter of The King, we must always be aware of our appearance, our outward AND our spiritual appearance, before God and mankind. We MUST represent Him in the right way. So how best to "dress for success" in God's Kingdom?"

First of all, we need to dress in clothes that do not hide our God-given gender … Women should dress and look like women. And men should dress and look like men. As a Princess, we always want to dress to fit our station in the Kingdom. We should always wear clean clothing that looks nice on us. Whether we prefer to wear jeans and T-shirts or ball gowns, the clothes should be neat and tidy, without holes and as free of stains as possible. In the US today, men and women can wear just about anything they choose; women wear pants as often as dresses, yet they can still dress to show they are feminine no matter their choices.

As regarding our spiritual appearance, 1 Peter 3:3, NIV says; Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Peter wasn't telling us that we CAN'T wear jewelry, fancy hairdo's, makeup, etc. What he is saying that we should find our beauty inwardly and accentuate it outwardly and in modest attire.

Peter also implied that we need to protect our spiritual man by clothing it in the Holy Armor that Paul outlines in Ephesians 6:10-20: 

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people. Pray also for me, that whenever I speak, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should.

In other passages, Paul tells us to pray without ceasing. It is this continuous prayer that is a part of our spiritual defense system; a part of our Holy Armor. With it, we attack spiritual battlefields by enlisting the help of God and His angelic beings.

Take a look at the prayer requests that Paul has listed here for the Ephesians to pray for him. They are the same things we should be praying for all of our Christian Brothers and Sisters; strength, wisdom, guidance, discernment, boldness and words to share the gospel with others. Be sure to also include any special or specific needs of those brothers and sisters that you know personally. Our prayers are a part of their defenses too; just as are their prayers for us.

So clothe yourselves in Christ’s mind and protect yourself with His Holy Armor and ALWAYS look like the True Princess you are!

Now, we princesses can truly belong to Prince Charming, Jesus! And so can all those princes – heroes or otherwise – we knew as children. Though some days we couldn’t tell the dark knights from the good guys. Or which young ladies were princesses and which evil witches. He always knew which of us would give our lives over to His keeping and be a part of His Bride and His Kingdom forever.

Even if you have not lived a life worthy of His Bride, He still wants you to come, repent, and start anew in His Kingdom. In fact, a wise person once told me, as long as a person draws breath, there is a chance for them to be a part of the Kingdom of God.

Not sure if you belong to the Kingdom? Are you still breathing? Want to assure your place in the Kingdom, walking beside THE Prince????

We all have to start in the same place…. at the foot of His cross…. before we can walk the streets of gold in The Kingdom of God.


You can write your thoughts in your journal or in the comments section below.
·        Is Jesus your ‘Prince Charming?’

·        Why or why not?
Just ask Him right now to forgive you of your sin. Repent and determine to live your life to please Him, alone. Ask Him to come live in your heart forever!

·        What do you need to change to put Him in His proper place?

·        He is waiting for you to ask Him in.  You can do so now in prayer, you can write your prayers in your journal and/or place them in the comments section below:

Dear Lord:

Friday, November 4, 2016

Activities for Growth - Clearer Thinking

Distinguishing Between the Rational and Irrational

We all need to learn the difference between our rational and irrational thoughts and beliefs. We all have many thoughts throughout our day. Though we make no front brain decisions on our thoughts being rational or irrational, we automatically make that decision in the back of our mind every time a thought enters our mind. Our previous interpersonal interactions form the basis on which these decisions are made.

In this assignment, you will be listing 25 of your irrational beliefs, ideas that you have held for at least the last 10 years, and their corresponding truths or rational ideas. At least 10 of these MUST be about love, romance, and sexual intimacy. Placing this list in your journal is a great idea for you will be able to look back and see where you have come from when you begin making progress in this arena.

Take a page – or pages – in your journal, divide it into two columns; with the irrational thoughts in one column and their rational ideas in the other.


Irrational Thought: If we love each other, then we should be together.
Rational/Truthful Response: Being “In Love” isn’t enough for a healthy relationship. Much more is needed for relationship strength, growth … to build success.

Irrational Thought: I’m a loser. I’ll never amount to anything more.
Rational/Truthful Response: It is my choices that decide if / how I reach my goals. I may just be my own worst enemy.

Making Changes:

How does writing down my beliefs and their corresponding truths help me to make changes in my life?

By writing down these thoughts and the truth side by side, we are confronting the very ideals that have lead us to these behaviors we are now working to change within us. Thus we will begin forming new attitudes and behaviors, new ideas, which will help us to better conform to the image of Christ – the perfected individual – that we all long to become.

Time to Complete:

This project should be completed within a two week period. As you will need time for planning and critical thinking about your assumptions with regard to your sexual behavior and personal relationships. Take up to another week for writing down your thoughts out clearly and concisely. The maximum time for this assignment is three weeks. After you have written this chart in your journal take the time to discuss it with your mentor. They will be able to help you see things you might not think about in your healing process.

Thursday, November 3, 2016

P. E. A. R. L. s

On The Heavenly Highway to Purity

As I was preparing to write rules for dating for Christian Ladies’, I was reminded of the verse in Proverbs 31:10, which says: “Who can find a virtuous woman?  For her worth is far above rubies.”  Then I thought, many of us more resemble a pearl – or P. E. A. R. L.

A pearl starts its existence as a grain of sand that has gotten inside of an oyster, or another mollusk, and irritated its lining. This irritation causes the oyster to coat that sand with layer upon layer of nacre — also called ‘mother-of-pearl’, the mineral substance that fashions the oysters’ shells. This mineral compound makes a gem of great beauty and much monetary value from an inconsequential and irritating grain of sand.

 Ladies, we have caused many people to be irritated, just like that tiny bit of sand has the oyster.  But our irritations have more in common with the layers of an onion. As we grow in Christ, God is constantly peeling away our many smelly layers of sin and impurity.  So I came up with an acronym for all of us who are traveling this road toward purity.  We are to be true P.E.A.R.L.s:  Pure and Exciting, but Always a Real Lady.  As such we are traveling the Heavenly Highway to Purity in Jesus.

We P.E.A.R.L.s need to act very differently than women of the world would when we are seeking to meet and marry the man God has created us to be “an helpmeet” for.  So this chapter is an outline for us to follow as we search for that special someone … or not, depending on God’s call on your life.


As P.E.A.R.L.s we need to be modest in our language and actions, but most importantly in the way that we dress.  The reasons for this are very clear and spelled out for us in God’s word.  I Timothy 2:9-10, the Message Bible says: “I also want the women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, adorning themselves, not with elaborate hairstyles or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God.”

God wasn’t telling ladies not to dress nicely.  No, this command is much more pointed; He is telling Godly ladies not to dress provocatively.  Not to wear their skirts and slacks so tight or short as to leave little or nothing to a man’s imagination.  Not to wear our blouses so low as to expose our cleavage for them to drool over.  This is with very good reason; it is because when we dress as women of the world dress we are inviting men, and more importantly our Christian brothers, to participate in the sin of adultery with their eyes.  But more than that, our invitation to men into this sin makes us a participant with them in that sin.

We can see this participation in Matthew 5:27-28, the New English Translation: “You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to desire her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”  These are strong words, but very true. 

As Godly ladies, we are to treat every man – even single men, especially our Christian brothers – as though they are some else’s husband; for in essence they really are.  We don’t want women that work with our husbands to flaunt their bodies in front of him, so why would we do so to another woman’s husband?

A man may look after a woman who is dressed provocatively in lust for a moment.  He may even comment to his buddies that he “would like to have some of that,” as she walks by.  But she is not the one he would choose to “bring home to Mama!”  She is not the woman chosen as a lifetime helpmeet.  A lady who dresses modestly leaves men guessing as to what she is all about.  She is one of life’s great mysteries that he must discover the meaning of.  Let me give you an example we all can relate to ...

During the Christmas season, we have ample opportunity to watch children in the stores telling their parents I want this toy or that game.  When Christmas finally arrives, and the presents all are set out under the tree, there is great anticipation as they wait to unwrap them. I have seen my own children, during the days before Christmas, looking under the tree for their gifts.  There were a few times that a gift or two was too large or oddly shaped to be wrapped.  They would be just there under the tree, with the others, though unwrapped.  Every single time this happened my children were the most interested in the gifts they had to unwrap than in those which were “undressed,” so to speak.  There was no challenge, nothing to dream for, to long after when the gift was not wrapped in pretty paper and ribbons . . . It is the same with a woman who dresses provocatively, she has left nothing a mystery for men to wonder after.


As P.E.A.R.L.s we must exude a Godly air of confidence.  This confidence must pour forth from every inch of your being and must be highlighted in godly purity and holiness. 

The Bible says in 1 Peter 1:15-16 NIV; “As obedient children, let yourselves be pulled into a way of life shaped by God’s life, a life energetic and blazing with holiness. God said, ‘I am holy; you be holy.’”

  • This Godly Attitude will be in your smile, not just on you lip, but also in the smiling sparkle of your eyes. 
  • It will be in the way you give a slight pause between sentences during a conversation; never babbling on out of nervousness. 
  • It will be in the way you listen very attentively when someone speaks.
  • It will be in the very way you breathe; slow and sure of yourself.
  • It will be in your posture – you will stand straight and tall.
  • It will be in your every step, walking briskly with your head held high and your shoulders back, but with an air of purity and God’s Holy Spirit as your grounding force.

Our attitude should never be one of smugness or of a “holier than thou-ness” or feeling we better than others.  No we are to exude an air of His holiness, as if He was and is the very air that we breathe; the very life source of our being.  Our attitude is that we are servants … servants of God and of each other.  Following the very example of Jesus:

“Jesus knew that the Father had put him in complete charge of everything, that he came from God and was on his way back to God. So he got up from the supper table, set aside his robe, and put on an apron. Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the feet of the disciples, drying them with his apron …

“. . . Jesus said, “If you’ve had a bath in the morning, you only need your feet washed now and you’re clean from head to toe. My concern, you understand, is holiness, not hygiene. So now you’re clean. But not every one of you.” (He knew who was betraying him. That’s why he said, “Not every one of you.”) After he had finished washing their feet, he took his robe, put it back on, and went back to his place at the table.

“Then he said, “Do you understand what I have done to you? You address me as ‘Teacher’ and ‘Master,’ and rightly so. That is what I am. So if I, the Master and Teacher, washed your feet, you must now wash each other’s feet. I’ve laid down a pattern for you. What I’ve done, you do. I’m only pointing out the obvious. A servant is not ranked above his master; an employee doesn’t give orders to the employer. If you understand what I’m telling you, act like it—and live a blessed life. John 13: 4, 5, 12-17 MSG.

 So as P.E.A.R.L.s we are to be:

·       Modest [in word, deed and apparel], confident, holy, servants of the living God, Jesus.
·       We are to be His examples in this world all of our days, ministering to the needs of those in our families, church bodies and communities in the various jobs and duties He has placed us in. 

God has placed a calling on each one of us; He has given us each a job to do within the body of Christ.  This job may be in the church as teachers, youth ministers, etc. It may be in our communities as civic leaders, teachers, typists, medical positions or whatever field you are currently working.  Every job – every position – is a ministry to Jesus; a calling to His service and you, and as P.E.A.R.L.s, should be His willing and obedient servants wherever He has called you to be.  Not every missionary is called to a foreign field, in fact most of us are called minister for Jesus right in the cities and towns where we live and work every day.  Just like the old saying, ‘bloom and grow where you are planted!’  This is exactly what Jesus has called us as P.E.A.R.L.s to do; line upon line, precept upon precept; as is stated in Isaiah 28:13

Your past relationships and other failures are insignificant, so leave them at home in your closet.  Remember, you are a P.E.A.R.L.!  Don’t beg or act desperate. Only date men who want to be with you. Trust God and His abundant goodness.  Don’t chase anyone and never settle.

*Check out the Activities for Growth - Clearer Thinking post*


  1. What does being a P.E.A.R.L. mean to you? 
  2. What do you need to change to be a P.E.A.R.L.?


You can’t make these changes alone.  Ask Him to make them in you and record your prayers in your journal.

Dear Lord: